Dorothy Parker

Submitted by cvining on

Razors pain you;
Rivers are damp;
Acids stain you;
And drugs cause cramps.
Guns aren’t lawful;
Nooses give;
Gas smells awful;
You might as well live

     -- Dorothy Parker

Submitted by cvining on

She runs the gamut of emotions from A to B. (speaking of Katharine Hepburn)

     -- Dorothy Parker

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Men seldom make passes
At girls who wear glasses.

     -- Dorothy Parker

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They sicken of the calm, who knew the storm.

     -- Dorothy Parker

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That would be a good thing for them to cut on my tombstone: Wherever she went, including here, it was against her better judgment.

     -- Dorothy Parker

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The best way to keep children home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant--and let the air out of the tires.

     -- Dorothy Parker

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If wild my breast and sore my pride,
I bask in dreams of suicide,
If cool my heart and high my head
I think “How lucky are the dead.“

     -- Dorothy Parker

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If all the girls who attended the Yale prom were laid end to end, I wouldn‘t be a bit surprised.

     -- Dorothy Parker

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Brevity is the soul of lingerie.

     -- Dorothy Parker

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A little bad taste is like a nice dash of paprika.

     -- Dorothy Parker

Dorothy Parker