Humor https://cvining.com/ en Panama Canal goes the wrong way https://cvining.com/panama-canal-goes-wrong-way <article role="article" class="node node--type-article node--promoted node--view-mode-teaser"> <h2> <a href="/panama-canal-goes-wrong-way" rel="bookmark"><span class="field field--name-title field--type-string field--label-hidden">Panama Canal goes the wrong way</span> </a> </h2> <footer> <div class="submitted"> Submitted by <span class="field field--name-uid field--type-entity-reference field--label-hidden"><span>cvining</span></span> on <span class="field field--name-created field--type-created field--label-hidden">Wed, 04/20/2022 - 22:28</span> </div> </footer> <div class="content"> <div class="layout layout--onecol"> <div class="layout__region layout__region--content"> <div class="block"> <div class="content"> <div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-body field--type-text-with-summary field--label-hidden field__item"><p>Fun fact I stumbled on: the Caribbean/Atlantic entrance to the Panama Canal is WEST of the Pacific entrance.</p> <p>A geographic oddity</p> <p><img alt="Panama Canal" data-entity-type="file" data-entity-uuid="ffd5f3d9-230e-4a2b-8bad-585d088c0c67" src="/sites/cvining.com/files/inline-images/Screenshot_20220420-222253_Chrome.jpg" width="1200" height="963" loading="lazy" /></p> </div> </div> </div> <div class="block"> <div class="content"> <div class="field field--name-taxonomy-vocabulary-2 field--type-entity-reference field--label-inline clearfix"> <div class="field__label">Commentary</div> <div class="field__item"><a href="/category/commentary/humor" hreflang="en">Humor</a></div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="block"> <div class="content"> <div class="node__links"> <div class="links"> <ul class="links inline"><li class="node-readmore"><a href="/panama-canal-goes-wrong-way" rel="tag" title="Panama Canal goes the wrong way" hreflang="en">Read more<span class="visually-hidden"> about Panama Canal goes the wrong way</span></a></li><li class="comment-forbidden"></li></ul> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </article> Thu, 21 Apr 2022 05:28:10 +0000 cvining 2015 at https://cvining.com Gnosis for the day https://cvining.com/gnosis-day <article role="article" class="node node--type-article node--promoted node--view-mode-teaser"> <h2> <a href="/gnosis-day" rel="bookmark"><span class="field field--name-title field--type-string field--label-hidden">Gnosis for the day</span> </a> </h2> <footer> <div class="submitted"> Submitted by <span class="field field--name-uid field--type-entity-reference field--label-hidden"><span>cvining</span></span> on <span class="field field--name-created field--type-created field--label-hidden">Mon, 12/20/2021 - 13:51</span> </div> </footer> <div class="content"> <div class="layout layout--onecol"> <div class="layout__region layout__region--content"> <div class="block"> <div class="content"> <div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-body field--type-text-with-summary field--label-hidden field__item"><p>You can lead a horse to water but you can't make him get a vaccine or booster.</p> <p>He who lives by denying science dies denying science.</p> <p>There are no atheists in foxholes or deniers in hospitals.</p> <p>He died doing what he loved: being an idiot.</p> <div dir="auto">I don't know why the "g" is silent in "gnostic" but not in "agnostic".</div> <div dir="auto"> </div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="block"> <div class="content"> <div class="field field--name-taxonomy-vocabulary-2 field--type-entity-reference field--label-inline clearfix"> <div class="field__label">Commentary</div> <div class="field__item"><a href="/category/commentary/humor" hreflang="en">Humor</a></div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="block"> <div class="content"> <div class="node__links"> <div class="links"> <ul class="links inline"><li class="node-readmore"><a href="/gnosis-day" rel="tag" title="Gnosis for the day" hreflang="und">Read more<span class="visually-hidden"> about Gnosis for the day</span></a></li><li class="comment-forbidden"></li></ul> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </article> Mon, 20 Dec 2021 21:51:31 +0000 cvining 1994 at https://cvining.com Where were you when? https://cvining.com/where-were-you-when <article role="article" class="node node--type-article node--promoted node--view-mode-teaser"> <h2> <a href="/where-were-you-when" rel="bookmark"><span class="field field--name-title field--type-string field--label-hidden">Where were you when?</span> </a> </h2> <footer> <div class="submitted"> Submitted by <span class="field field--name-uid field--type-entity-reference field--label-hidden"><span>cvining</span></span> on <span class="field field--name-created field--type-created field--label-hidden">Tue, 01/12/2021 - 07:46</span> </div> </footer> <div class="content"> <div class="layout layout--onecol"> <div class="layout__region layout__region--content"> <div class="block"> <div class="content"> <div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-body field--type-text-with-summary field--label-hidden field__item"><p>Where were you when the Nazis bombed Pearl?<br />Where were you when Ruby killed Jack?<br />Where were you when Bobby killed Martin?<br />Where were you when Glenn walked the moon?<br />Where were you when Columbia was challenged?<br />Where were you when Chad hanged Al?<br />Where were you when the CIA burned the twins?<br />Where were you when Donald pulled off his coup?</p> </div> </div> </div> <div class="block"> <div class="content"> <div class="field field--name-taxonomy-vocabulary-2 field--type-entity-reference field--label-inline clearfix"> <div class="field__label">Commentary</div> <div class="field__item"><a href="/category/commentary/humor" hreflang="en">Humor</a></div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="block"> <div class="content"> <div class="node__links"> <div class="links"> <ul class="links inline"><li class="node-readmore"><a href="/where-were-you-when" rel="tag" title="Where were you when?" hreflang="und">Read more<span class="visually-hidden"> about Where were you when?</span></a></li><li class="comment-forbidden"></li></ul> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </article> Tue, 12 Jan 2021 15:46:11 +0000 cvining 1987 at https://cvining.com Casey At The Bat https://cvining.com/casey-bat <article role="article" class="node node--type-article node--promoted node--view-mode-teaser"> <h2> <a href="/casey-bat" rel="bookmark"><span class="field field--name-title field--type-string field--label-hidden">Casey At The Bat</span> </a> </h2> <footer> <div class="submitted"> Submitted by <span class="field field--name-uid field--type-entity-reference field--label-hidden"><span>cvining</span></span> on <span class="field field--name-created field--type-created field--label-hidden">Sun, 04/17/2016 - 18:31</span> </div> </footer> <div class="content"> <div class="layout layout--onecol"> <div class="layout__region layout__region--content"> <div class="block"> <div class="content"> <div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-body field--type-text-with-summary field--label-hidden field__item"><div class="view view-poems view-id-poems view-display-id-poem_author_dob_dod view-dom-id-6a9f165c721c1c6f3ed8c78bf31002b4"> <div class="view-content"> <div class="views-row views-row-1 views-row-odd views-row-first views-row-last clearfix"> <div class="views-field views-field-nothing"> <h2 class="subheading"><span class="node-title">Ernest Lawrence Thayer</span></h2> </div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="field field-name-body field-type-text-with-summary field-label-hidden"> <div class="field-items"> <div class="field-item even"> <pre>The outlook wasn’t brilliant for the Mudville nine that day: The score stood four to two, with but one inning more to play, And then when Cooney died at first, and Barrows did the same, A pall-like silence fell upon the patrons of the game. A straggling few got up to go in deep despair. The rest Clung to the hope which springs eternal in the human breast; They thought, “If only Casey could but get a whack at that— We’d put up even money now, with Casey at the bat.” But Flynn preceded Casey, as did also Jimmy Blake, And the former was a hoodoo, while the latter was a cake; So upon that stricken multitude grim melancholy sat, For there seemed but little chance of Casey getting to the bat. But Flynn let drive a single, to the wonderment of all, And Blake, the much despisèd, tore the cover off the ball; And when the dust had lifted, and men saw what had occurred, There was Jimmy safe at second and Flynn a-hugging third. Then from five thousand throats and more there rose a lusty yell; It rumbled through the valley, it rattled in the dell; It pounded on the mountain and recoiled upon the flat, For Casey, mighty Casey, was advancing to the bat. There was ease in Casey’s manner as he stepped into his place; There was pride in Casey’s bearing and a smile lit Casey’s face. And when, responding to the cheers, he lightly doffed his hat, No stranger in the crowd could doubt ‘twas Casey at the bat. Ten thousand eyes were on him as he rubbed his hands with dirt; Five thousand tongues applauded when he wiped them on his shirt; Then while the writhing pitcher ground the ball into his hip, Defiance flashed in Casey’s eye, a sneer curled Casey’s lip. And now the leather-covered sphere came hurtling through the air, And Casey stood a-watching it in haughty grandeur there. Close by the sturdy batsman the ball unheeded sped— “That ain’t my style," said Casey. “Strike one!” the umpire said. From the benches, black with people, there went up a muffled roar, Like the beating of the storm-waves on a stern and distant shore; “Kill him! Kill the umpire!” shouted someone on the stand; And it’s likely they’d have killed him had not Casey raised his hand. With a smile of Christian charity great Casey’s visage shone; He stilled the rising tumult; he bade the game go on; He signaled to the pitcher, and once more the dun sphere flew; But Casey still ignored it and the umpire said, “Strike two!” “Fraud!” cried the maddened thousands, and echo answered “Fraud!” But one scornful look from Casey and the audience was awed. They saw his face grow stern and cold, they saw his muscles strain, And they knew that Casey wouldn’t let that ball go by again. The sneer is gone from Casey’s lip, his teeth are clenched in hate, He pounds with cruel violence his bat upon the plate; And now the pitcher holds the ball, and now he lets it go, And now the air is shattered by the force of Casey’s blow. Oh, somewhere in this favoured land the sun is shining bright, The band is playing somewhere, and somewhere hearts are light; And somewhere men are laughing, and somewhere children shout, But there is no joy in Mudville—mighty Casey has struck out.<br /><br /><br /><a href="https://www.poets.org/poetsorg/poem/casey-bat"><span>This poem is in the public domain.</div> </div> </div> <div class="block"> <div class="content"> <div class="field field--name-taxonomy-vocabulary-2 field--type-entity-reference field--label-inline clearfix"> <div class="field__label">Commentary</div> <div class="field__item"><a href="/category/commentary/humor" hreflang="en">Humor</a></div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="block"> <div class="content"> <div class="node__links"> <div class="links"> <ul class="links inline"><li class="node-readmore"><a href="/casey-bat" rel="tag" title="Casey At The Bat" hreflang="und">Read more<span class="visually-hidden"> about Casey At The Bat</span></a></li><li class="comment-forbidden"></li></ul> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </article> Mon, 18 Apr 2016 01:31:06 +0000 cvining 1750 at https://cvining.com New Horizons https://cvining.com/new-horizons <article role="article" class="node node--type-article node--promoted node--view-mode-teaser"> <h2> <a href="/new-horizons" rel="bookmark"><span class="field field--name-title field--type-string field--label-hidden">New Horizons</span> </a> </h2> <footer> <div class="submitted"> Submitted by <span class="field field--name-uid field--type-entity-reference field--label-hidden"><span>cvining</span></span> on <span class="field field--name-created field--type-created field--label-hidden">Mon, 06/01/2015 - 13:26</span> </div> </footer> <div class="content"> <div class="layout layout--onecol"> <div class="layout__region layout__region--content"> <div class="block"> <div class="content"> <div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-body field--type-text-with-summary field--label-hidden field__item"><p><a href="http://www.xkcd.com/1532/"><img src="http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/new_horizons.png" title="New Horizons" width="332" height="1013" /></a></p> </div> </div> </div> <div class="block"> <div class="content"> <div class="field field--name-taxonomy-vocabulary-2 field--type-entity-reference field--label-inline clearfix"> <div class="field__label">Commentary</div> <div class="field__item"><a href="/category/commentary/humor" hreflang="en">Humor</a></div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="block"> <div class="content"> <div class="node__links"> <div class="links"> <ul class="links inline"><li class="node-readmore"><a href="/new-horizons" rel="tag" title="New Horizons" hreflang="und">Read more<span class="visually-hidden"> about New Horizons</span></a></li><li class="comment-forbidden"></li></ul> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </article> Mon, 01 Jun 2015 20:26:21 +0000 cvining 1229 at https://cvining.com Kurt Vonnegut - Some Writing Advice https://cvining.com/kurt-vonnegut-some-writing-advice <article role="article" class="node node--type-article node--promoted node--view-mode-teaser"> <h2> <a href="/kurt-vonnegut-some-writing-advice" rel="bookmark"><span class="field field--name-title field--type-string field--label-hidden">Kurt Vonnegut - Some Writing Advice</span> </a> </h2> <footer> <div class="submitted"> Submitted by <span class="field field--name-uid field--type-entity-reference field--label-hidden"><span>cvining</span></span> on <span class="field field--name-created field--type-created field--label-hidden">Tue, 03/17/2015 - 13:12</span> </div> </footer> <div class="content"> <div class="layout layout--onecol"> <div class="layout__region layout__region--content"> <div class="block"> <div class="content"> <div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-body field--type-text-with-summary field--label-hidden field__item"><h2>Kurt Vonnegut</h2> <p><span><a href="http://www.troubling.info/vonnegut.html">original posting was on this site</a></span></p> <p>Eight rules for writing fiction:</p> <p>1. Use the time of a total stranger in such a way that he or she will not feel the time was wasted.</p> <p>2. Give the reader at least one character he or she can root for.</p> <p>3. Every character should want something, even if it is only a glass of water.</p> <p>4. Every sentence must do one of two things -- reveal character or advance the action.</p></div> </div> </div> <div class="block"> <div class="content"> <div class="field field--name-taxonomy-vocabulary-2 field--type-entity-reference field--label-inline clearfix"> <div class="field__label">Commentary</div> <div class="field__item"><a href="/category/commentary/humor" hreflang="en">Humor</a></div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="block"> <div class="content"> <div class="node__links"> <div class="links"> <ul class="links inline"><li class="node-readmore"><a href="/kurt-vonnegut-some-writing-advice" rel="tag" title="Kurt Vonnegut - Some Writing Advice" hreflang="und">Read more<span class="visually-hidden"> about Kurt Vonnegut - Some Writing Advice</span></a></li><li class="comment-forbidden"></li></ul> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </article> Tue, 17 Mar 2015 20:12:22 +0000 cvining 1222 at https://cvining.com Fundamental Forces https://cvining.com/fundamental-forces <article role="article" class="node node--type-article node--promoted node--view-mode-teaser"> <h2> <a href="/fundamental-forces" rel="bookmark"><span class="field field--name-title field--type-string field--label-hidden">Fundamental Forces</span> </a> </h2> <footer> <div class="submitted"> Submitted by <span class="field field--name-uid field--type-entity-reference field--label-hidden"><span>cvining</span></span> on <span class="field field--name-created field--type-created field--label-hidden">Fri, 02/20/2015 - 12:17</span> </div> </footer> <div class="content"> <div class="layout layout--onecol"> <div class="layout__region layout__region--content"> <div class="block"> <div class="content"> <div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-body field--type-text-with-summary field--label-hidden field__item"><p> </p> <p><img src="/sites/cvining.com/files/oldprivatefiles/images/fundamental_forces.png" alt="Fundamental Forces" title="Fundamental Forces" width="500" height="191" /></p> <p>From <a href="http://xkcd.com/about/">This Guy</a>, who says it's OK if I post his comics here, which sounds maybe more special than it really is since he says anyone can do it, but still I like to think he knows who I am and said to himself "sure, this <a href="cvining.com">cvining.com</a> guy is cool and I'm pleased as punch he posts my comics on his website."</p></div> </div> </div> <div class="block"> <div class="content"> <div class="field field--name-taxonomy-vocabulary-2 field--type-entity-reference field--label-inline clearfix"> <div class="field__label">Commentary</div> <div class="field__item"><a href="/category/commentary/humor" hreflang="en">Humor</a></div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="block"> <div class="content"> <div class="node__links"> <div class="links"> <ul class="links inline"><li class="node-readmore"><a href="/fundamental-forces" rel="tag" title="Fundamental Forces" hreflang="und">Read more<span class="visually-hidden"> about Fundamental Forces</span></a></li><li class="comment-forbidden"></li></ul> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </article> Fri, 20 Feb 2015 20:17:57 +0000 cvining 1218 at https://cvining.com Heisenberg Uncertainty App https://cvining.com/heisenberg-uncertainty-app <article role="article" class="node node--type-article node--view-mode-teaser"> <h2> <a href="/heisenberg-uncertainty-app" rel="bookmark"><span class="field field--name-title field--type-string field--label-hidden">Heisenberg Uncertainty App</span> </a> </h2> <footer> <div class="submitted"> Submitted by <span class="field field--name-uid field--type-entity-reference field--label-hidden"><span>cvining</span></span> on <span class="field field--name-created field--type-created field--label-hidden">Wed, 01/14/2015 - 09:51</span> </div> </footer> <div class="content"> <div class="layout layout--onecol"> <div class="layout__region layout__region--content"> <div class="block"> <div class="content"> <div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-body field--type-text-with-summary field--label-hidden field__item"><p><img src="/sites/cvining.com/files/oldprivatefiles/images/20150114-xkcd-location_sharing.png" title="Location Sharing - xkcd.com" width="500" height="238" /></p> <p>Souce: <a href="http://xkcd.com">http://xkcd.com</a>, 20150114</p> </div> </div> </div> <div class="block"> <div class="content"> <div class="field field--name-taxonomy-vocabulary-2 field--type-entity-reference field--label-inline clearfix"> <div class="field__label">Commentary</div> <div class="field__item"><a href="/category/commentary/humor" hreflang="en">Humor</a></div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="block"> <div class="content"> <div class="node__links"> <div class="links"> <ul class="links inline"><li class="node-readmore"><a href="/heisenberg-uncertainty-app" rel="tag" title="Heisenberg Uncertainty App" hreflang="und">Read more<span class="visually-hidden"> about Heisenberg Uncertainty App</span></a></li><li class="comment-forbidden"></li></ul> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </article> Wed, 14 Jan 2015 17:51:12 +0000 cvining 1214 at https://cvining.com Tiger food https://cvining.com/tiger-food <article role="article" class="node node--type-article node--promoted node--view-mode-teaser"> <h2> <a href="/tiger-food" rel="bookmark"><span class="field field--name-title field--type-string field--label-hidden">Tiger food</span> </a> </h2> <footer> <div class="submitted"> Submitted by <span class="field field--name-uid field--type-entity-reference field--label-hidden"><span>cvining</span></span> on <span class="field field--name-created field--type-created field--label-hidden">Fri, 11/14/2014 - 00:40</span> </div> </footer> <div class="content"> <div class="layout layout--onecol"> <div class="layout__region layout__region--content"> <div class="block"> <div class="content"> <div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-body field--type-text-with-summary field--label-hidden field__item"><p>Now we know the real meaning of life:</p> <p><img src="http://assets.amuniversal.com/84f8e1802a320132a1a4005056a9545d" title="Tiger food" width="600" height="190" /></p> </div> </div> </div> <div class="block"> <div class="content"> <div class="field field--name-taxonomy-vocabulary-2 field--type-entity-reference field--label-inline clearfix"> <div class="field__label">Commentary</div> <div class="field__item"><a href="/category/commentary/humor" hreflang="en">Humor</a></div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="block"> <div class="content"> <div class="node__links"> <div class="links"> <ul class="links inline"><li class="node-readmore"><a href="/tiger-food" rel="tag" title="Tiger food" hreflang="und">Read more<span class="visually-hidden"> about Tiger food</span></a></li><li class="comment-forbidden"></li></ul> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </article> Fri, 14 Nov 2014 08:40:36 +0000 cvining 1204 at https://cvining.com Car theft: Gotta Love It! https://cvining.com/car-theft-gotta-love-it <article role="article" class="node node--type-article node--promoted node--view-mode-teaser"> <h2> <a href="/car-theft-gotta-love-it" rel="bookmark"><span class="field field--name-title field--type-string field--label-hidden">Car theft: Gotta Love It!</span> </a> </h2> <footer> <div class="submitted"> Submitted by <span class="field field--name-uid field--type-entity-reference field--label-hidden"><span>cvining</span></span> on <span class="field field--name-created field--type-created field--label-hidden">Fri, 04/25/2014 - 14:01</span> </div> </footer> <div class="content"> <div class="layout layout--onecol"> <div class="layout__region layout__region--content"> <div class="block"> <div class="content"> <div class="clearfix text-formatted field field--name-body field--type-text-with-summary field--label-hidden field__item"><p>From <a href="http://seattletimes.com/html/localnews/2023454509_apxdeputyscarstolen.html">http://seattletimes.com/html/localnews/2023454509_apxdeputyscarstolen.h…</a></p> <p><span>"</span><span>Spokane County sheriff's officers say a car theft suspect being chased on foot Thursday night by a deputy managed to double back and steal the deputy's patrol car."</span></p> </div> </div> </div> <div class="block"> <div class="content"> <div class="field field--name-taxonomy-vocabulary-2 field--type-entity-reference field--label-inline clearfix"> <div class="field__label">Commentary</div> <div class="field__item"><a href="/category/commentary/humor" hreflang="en">Humor</a></div> </div> </div> </div> <div class="block"> <div class="content"> <div class="node__links"> <div class="links"> <ul class="links inline"><li class="node-readmore"><a href="/car-theft-gotta-love-it" rel="tag" title="Car theft: Gotta Love It!" hreflang="und">Read more<span class="visually-hidden"> about Car theft: Gotta Love It!</span></a></li><li class="comment-forbidden"></li></ul> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </div> </article> Fri, 25 Apr 2014 21:01:57 +0000 cvining 1187 at https://cvining.com